Guest Article: The Scratchy Files

Scratchy’s player has been kind enough to provide us with a look at the events of Session Two so far from Scratchy’s perspective, focusing on the time when Scratchy was away from the party scouting. Thus I present, without further ado, The Scratchy Files!

Episode Two

The Scratchy files.

It was a long, cold night. Or at least it was chilly. I’d been sitting on this rooftop for hours. Another stake out. Another suspect I couldn’t let get away. But I’m getting ahead of myself. How did I wind up on this roof?

We were out for a night on the town. Me, Big Sis and the two freaks the Guild teamed us up with- a noam magick man, and some dude who claims he has angel blood. I’ve heard better stories. We were on a case. Looking for a woman, or just a lead. But we were getting more questions than answers. Questions like ‘Is that a goblin?’.

Natalya, the dame we were looking for, was a second story gal. If she didn’t want to be found, this wasn’t going to be easy.

Asking around got someone’s attention. Soon I was tailing some creep who thought he was being clever. Clever enough for a noam and a whatchmakallit? Sure. But not clever enough for Scratchy.

Eventually the creep stopped following Sis and the others. I had a hunch he wasn’t just giving up. I followed my hunch… and the creep. He passed a message to a beggar. A contact? A network? This was getting interesting. The beggar then met up with a gang of thugs. Wreckwash Blades. I know their kind. A word from the beggar and they were off. I knew where they were heading.

It wasn’t where I wanted to go, but I had to follow. I couldn’t let them ambush Sis. Sure, Big Sis can take on a handful of street thugs by herself and those other two guys could probably distract one or something. But this gang was big. And ugly.

Two arrows from the fastest shot in Magnimar and their ambush was blown. After the thugs saw they were up against Sis and Scratchy, half of them passed out in fear. We made quick work of the whole lot.

Back in the interrogation room, things weren’t going well. The noam kept trying to scare the crooks into talking. A hairy runt in a robe might frighten school girls. There was some talk about dresses and what he does to halflings. What kinda` short freaks do they let into this Guild?

Theo, the angel guy, was trying to play ‘good cop’. He thinks he’s a smooth talker. He’s stuck-up, thinks he’s better than everyone and has this annoying habit of knowing what he’s talking about. I never let stuff like that slow me down.

It was time for Scratchy to step in. I know how to deal with hard scum like this. ‘Say sumtin`! You… you… hoo mans. Rawrkkr! Ooh, a mouse!’

We were getting nowhere. It was time to go back to the streets. I’d seen that creep’s face. He’s wasn’t going to get away from Scratchy. After I tracked him down, he led me to his boss. They led me to their hideout. And that get’s me back on this rooftop.

That door I’ve been staring at for hours finally opened. Out stepped the boss. Scratchy’s back in action. The boss man met up with a noble. This was big. Real big. I switched my tail.

This was no ordinary inbred, man-child. He was more alert than the scumbags. I needed to be careful. He didn’t want anyone following him. I soon found out why. He went straight to the City Guard tower. Then went inside.

What’s the Guild got us into? How high up does this go? Were we being set up? Still more questions than answers, but at least I had some answers.

Information can be the only weapon that matters in case like this. And we had some now. Enough to know if those thugs were lying to us. Enough to play them while they think they’re playing us.

We set up a meeting with the Donal, the head of the Blades. We meet at Indros cui Vydrarch, a public place, but I’m still on lookout. I smelled an ambush. If this was as big as I’m thinking, the gang would be willing to let a few foot soldiers take the fall to get rid of us. Soon enough, I saw what I was smelling. I gave the signal.

Shit. Why is every one looking this way? This whistle is louder than I thought. No matter. I’ve had to do worse things than hide out in a trash barrel before. Now that the goons know they won’t get the jump on us, they back off. We’ve earned the Don’s respect. He’ll need to negotiate with us.

Information and prisoners are exchanged. We get a name. Maybe I underestimated Theo and the noam. I’m sure big Sis made sure that the Don knew we meant business, but at least those two didn’t mess it up.

Thessylcrat? Marzipan? Human names are stupid. Don’t matter. We have a name. We have a lead. A little more asking around and we find out where he’s staying.

A sign outside tells us to leave a gift. `Just another beggar. Humans have stupid names and no dignity. Theo throws down a silver. The angel dude knows how to treat riff-raff. The crazy old codger steps outside.

The ingrate loon complains about the coin, but he still pockets it. He knows we want something. Bribes are a language I understand. Bribes are the language everyone who matters in this city speaks. We pay him.

The big folk talk in their usual circular nonsense. It’s time to cut to the chase. I can tell this guy’s only half as crazy as he’s acting. He’s hiding something. I need to out wit him. Get him to reveal more than he wants to.

‘Lookin` for girl! She disappeared. Nataly… Natlawa… err…’



‘Oh, she hasn’t disappeared. She’s hiding out at a flop house. I can tell you where its at.’

Another case cracked by the Goblin Gumshoe. With all the pieces in this puzzle, it almost seemed too easy… it was.

Posted in Guest Articles

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